Fenghuang to Yangshuo was approximately 8 hours of travel. Two trains and a taxi later, we arrived bleary-eyed at our hotel, hoping against hope that their restaurant was still open. Because we were staying out of the main town, we had very few options for food. Not only was the restaurant open, it had a huge vegetarian menu. And (I'm sorry) they had pasta. I ate so much. I was so happy. And now, full and content, I was able to notice that our hotel and its location, even in the dark, was spectacular.

Yangshuo was my favourite part of China, not just because I was able to eat again. We were staying in a converted sugar mill, surrounded by Karst mountains. And the hotel had a pet rabbit that followed people around. I named him Dennis, though I imagine he had a name already and found that very confusing. Unless his name was actually Dennis.

The only negative (and to be honest, weird) thing about Yangshuo was the influencers. Beautiful people would arrive, either with a long suffering camera-person partner, or a tripod, and take endless footage of themselves at the pool ‘enjoying' cocktails. One asked me to move out of her shot. Then they'd leave. Most of the people staying in one of the nicest hotels I've ever seen in my life looked grumpy and miserable the entire time. They didn't even drink the cocktails. It was baffling. We did see the insufferable influencers a lot in China, far more than I've noticed anywhere else. And far more blatant. Anyway, the influencers weren't hurting anyone I suppose, other than my self esteem as I shuffled down to the pool feeling like a garden gnome beside them. It's a shame they didn't seem to actually enjoy the thing they were presumably influencing about.

We went into the actual town and rented a scooter. Which reminds me, everything in China is electric. The lack of petrol/diesel smells and noise is quite something. The local area has lots of scenic spots along the river. Dan had hilariously suggested we cycle but I put a stop to that. By the time we set off it was midday and baking heat. We passed a sign for an upcoming cave, which sounded very appealing. The caves were impressive, with multicoloured lights, an optional breakneck boatride (no) and an optional mudbath (also no. The logistics alone). We passed both things, and I had no regrets. The mud bath was particularly strange, in mostly darkness with a low claustrophobic rocky ceiling. The scenery was like a fantasy movie. So green, so mountainous. And that's quite something coming from me - known hater of the outdoors.

As the town was so pretty and laid back during the day, we decided to go back at night to see it all lit up. What a horrible mistake that was. Sometimes, I'm in the mood for a stressful sensory overload of lights, clashing noise, and street food smells. This was not one of those days. We did, however, do a haunted house experience. We didn't really know what it was because everything was in Chinese but we tapped our AliPay app and went through a 20 minute experience of animatronic ghouls. The jump scares were minimal as you could always hear the hydraulic piston noise well in advance. That suited me. I hate a jump scare.